Beirut is in my heart

Only hours after my yesterdays post Beirut changed into a war zone due to two major explosions in the capitol of Lebanon.

I e-mailed the Beirut Film Society as they are the organizers of the festival. They instantly replied.. What a nightmare, for the Lebanese people who were already living in crisis. Truely heartbreaking.

I am sending prayers and love to Beirut and my thoughts are with them.

With love,
Farideh

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Beirut International Women Film Festival 2020

The Beirut International Women Film Festival is happening right now online and Finding Farideh is screening! If you like to see Finding Farideh and many more interesting films directed by women and or supporting women, then please e-mail bfsonlinefest@gmail.com to receive the film links.

BIWFF thank you for screening Finding Farideh and supporting the art and hard work of women! Very much needed in this world.

Chokran!

With love,
Farideh

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Another great picture..

Ali Akbar, Mohammed, Abbas, Ali, Sogra and I.. December 2015 train station Mashhad.

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The families together


10th of December 2018 in Mashhad

The Dindar family and Ali Akbar’s family and Zahra were at the cinema in Mashhad with Azadeh Moussavi & Kourosh Ataee, directors of Finding Farideh, to watch Finding Farideh for the first time!

Last picture of Rajad Ali with Finding Farideh.. glad he was able to see the end result!
Tayebeh never did.. Bless them all.

He was also the first man on the train station to give me 3 kisses.. so sweet.. Ali joon.
Such a precious picture this..

With love,
Farideh

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Spinsels

Zang

de adem, de klank en stilte
de trilling, het geluid en de melodie
de voorouders, het publiek en de spot
mijn gevoel wordt zichtbaar in het oude lied

de tong, de emotie en het volume
het hart, de opening en het loslaten
de engelen, mijn oor en licht
mijn hart hunkert naar bezielde aanraking

het initiatief, de leegte en invulling
de projectie, de reflectie en het inzicht
de liefde, het samenkomen en de resonantie
mijn liefde stroomt in kleurijke klanken alle kanten op

in het lied vind ik mijn weg terug naar het hart
naar de plek waar gedachtes niet wonen en
de liefde regeert en vermenigvuldigt
In de oceaan van het leven zing ik mijn lied.

-Farideh-

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Update operation

So it has been 2 weeks since I had an operation. I must say that I underestimated the process… I always think that I can handle it all by myself.. and I did. Though it was a bit tougher than I imagined it. I told everyone I will be fine. And I struggled at all levels for a few days/weeks and had to admit to myself that I do need help sometimes from others. It is ok to say I am not ok and accept offers from family and friends… Very difficult for me.

Then something else… when I removed the three plasters on my stomach, one was at my belly button. Right then and there I recognized my belly button as a holy place which now has been touched by the surgeon and nurses and they stitched it up.. the last time somebody did something to my belly button was when I was born and my birth mother was there with me. THAT was heartbreaking realization. Again now writing about it gives me tears. It just hits me you know. At least I know she was with me when giving birth to me right. I mean that is a fact. All of a sudden my belly button is touched by others, strange feeling. Kind of, it is not sacred anymore..

So back to Monday morning as I had an appointment with the surgeon about the pathalogic research of the tissue… I asked my mother to come with me as I needed support (learning lol). So the positive news is that it was not even tissue they removed, so we are not talking whether it would be good or bad tissue.. it was something else which is harmless, though still good that it is gone now. So that means my body is totally healthy!!!! The best case scenario according the surgeon. My goodness that was a relief to hear you have no idea.. All things were already pointing into that direction though still the research is final and my smile has not left my face that day.. Grateful and thrilled for this outcome, it gives me so much ENERGY!!!!!  Thanking all the nurses and doctors who were so kind to me at OLVG. They all made me feel very welcome and nurtured, I should have stayed there the 2 weeks of recovery, no joking. I was glad I could go home the same day. I hope my roommate in the hospital is doing well and is healing. Though it was definitely nice to be pampered for a short bit, for sure. Looking forward to the future and truely feeling blessed that this all happened within one month only. Case closed.

Thank you Angels.

With love,
Farideh

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Sweet music

Imen & Kiyanna with ‘Bache Mahal’

and perfect for my feelings these days..

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In Memoriam

Yesterday I received the news that Rajad Ali Dindar passed away in Mashhad…
Leaving behind his dear wife and children Javad, Majid and Elahe. So sad as he was a  young and my alleged brother at one point in life. He was such a charming man and I will miss him a lot. I am so sad and realizing I will not meet him again when going back to Iran. I had the feeling he was the patriarch of the family as he and his siblings lost their parents over 40 years ago. He will always be in my heart. Thinking of the entire family and sending my condoleances to them in these hard times.

Sending my love to the Dindar family.. and to his brother Abbas and 4 sisters.. Tooba, Soghra, Azra and Homa.

Rajab Ali is the second man on the right side sitting at the Persian rug.

The one who said during recording of Finding Farideh
‘She hasn’t chosen yet..’
(subject religion)

He and his dear wife gave me the Qoran after the results of the DNA test.
Ali and his wife and daughter also came to the train station to wave us off when we left Mashhad.. so heartwarming.

Rajad Ali is reunited with his parents and niece Samaneh, way too soon.
Bless them all. Dooset Daram.

With love,
Farideh

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Hydrangea Macrophylla ‘White Wave’

More than 2 meters tall and my pride in my garden: Hortensia White Wave

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Sweet music

Close your eyes, listen, feel and enjoy… Tania Kassis with Islamo-Christian AVE…

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